okay. so.

2006-04-13T21:04:00.000-07:00

feh. The last time I tried to update this it wouldn't let me cause it was all borky and rawr and mean and stuffs.

So I'm trying this again, although I sincerely doubt that anyone much reads it anymore. However on the off chance someone does take a gander, I'm still alive.

I've had a lot going on. And I've moved my thoughts to a more anon blog.

Should you be close to me and wish to know the inner workings of my oh so twisty little mind, drop me a line and I'll toss you the url.

Otherwise, take care all and be well.

We out.

2005-02-22T10:14:00.000-08:00

Well I'm updating and it's the SAME MONTH! Oh my goodness call the papers!

Okay that was kind of fun. But not really.

I had something to say, but then I read a few other blogs and totally forgot what it was. And I actually really wish I could remember because it was funny. At least it made me laugh when I thought of it, but now that I've forgotten what it was I'm no longer amused :(

Liz, I know you're out there and read this at least once in a while, I need you to help me change the background and text colors, cause it's hard on the eyes :) Thank you.

I've also noticed that when I don't start with my fingers on the right homekeys things turn out really ugly, but when I do I can not be looking anywhere near the computer and still type coherently and with very few spelling errors. I guess that whole typing class thing in high school paid off. Wow.

I've slacked horribly the last week or so with the dieting thing and gained back a little weight. Oops. But I'll fix that. Renewed vigor and all that rubbish. But every girl needs a little (or a lot if we're going to be perfectly honest here) every once in a while (nearly everyday for a whole week but really who's counting?).

Oh and men are great. Really. No really. Hubby sent me a cute little valentine's day ecard. Which considering I wasn't expecting even that is a really wonderful thing. Especially since I'd reminded him like 4 times that it was coming up. Maybe I expect too much?

Oh and fucktards is my new favorite word. I doubt I'll ever actually use it in a sentence since I'm really trying to curb my sailor's mouth, but it will certainly crack me up everytime I think of it. That's courtesy of Fish over under the clickies on the right of the screen if you want to go take a peek and don't already read the pink blog :)

And yet the original urge to update still eludes me. Bugger. Oh well, it'll come to me eventually. Maybe.

2005-02-04T14:51:00.000-08:00

My battle with the evil weight demon is going well. I'm up to 8 pounds and counting. Go me :) Soon I'll be able to wear cute clothes again. Yay. Everyone loves getting rid of fat clothes.

I've also managed to hold off on the brutal yet accidental destruction of my hubby. Yay again :)

I have however run up against a huge nasty brick wall with my search for nursing programs. I'm thinking that looking for the programs online isn't working for a reason. I just don't know what it is. Why wouldn't you have that kind of thing listed online? Poop. So I'll be busting out the good old phone book on Monday and making calls. There's got to be a program somewhere around here that will let me become an RN. Silly online stuff. Bah. The internet is NOT the best place to find things.

I find this disappointing, because let's face it, shopping and looking for things online is GREAT. But not when you can't find what you're looking for.

Also, homemade mac and cheese = yum.

2005-01-21T15:14:00.000-08:00

Wow. I wish I had an out of the house job/school/something to justify the purchase of an Ipod. They're SO CUTE!! And I hate to admit it, but I'd have to get the pink one. Even though pink is the color of pepto bismol and hell in general, it's just too cute for words.

Maybe that will be my present to myself upon completion of a nursing program and getting a real job :)

Not that my job now isn't important, but I think we're coming to the end (oh please all the gods that are or ever were!!!!) of my stint as a stay at home mom. Goodness knows I need to get back out into the real world with real people. And I'm sure it's about time he gets to realize that he is not the center of the universe.

Of course being a male, he may never realize this.

Hubby busted out with "I have a selfish streak," today. HAH! Excuse me while I give myself a hernia laughing over that one. A streak my happy white butterflied hiney! It's a freaking CHASM filled to the brim and overflowing with selfishness. But I maintain that he can't help it because it's one of those shortcomings inherent with being male and having a y chromosome.

No offense to men in general. I love men. They're fantasitc creatures. But they are a little focused on the one thing at a time and that's usually themselves. Not that women aren't just as bad sometimes. I'm sure I'm incredibly selfish on a regular basis, but it just doesn't seem that way. Course I'm inside looking out so of course it doesn't seem that way. I'm sure to hubby he doesn't seem selfish when looking out from himself either :)

I should make more of an effort to be understanding of him and his shortcomings (don't even want to go into my shortcomings, because well he points them out all the time so there's no need :P). That can wait til after I have a real job again. Until then, while I am raising the kid and changing diapers and clothes and cleaning up baby pee pee and poo poo and making food and beds and folding and washing clothes and cleaning house.... yeah he can take his selfish and blow it out his ass. I don't have to be understanding right now :P

However, I will give him credit for doing quite a bit of the helping kind of thing while I was at the grocery store the other day. Course it was all stuff he wanted done and I hadn't gotten to fast enough to suit him... but we'll ignore that and just be happy with what he did :) Someday I may get to take a break for real. You know where I'm not out doing a chore and the kid didn't have to go down for a nap before I got to leave and I don't have to be back in a couple of hours because they can't handle more than a couple hours with just the two of them :P

Poor hubby. Men suffer so much at the hands of women. We're horribly unfair to them. But until the day I get to initiate a quickie and be the only one that gets off and then gets to roll over and go to sleep leaving HIM all excited and ready to go, he can just suck it up and suffer the slings and arrows of having a woman in his life!

2005-01-20T12:07:00.000-08:00

Well! I finished and sent out my cards by the date I said I would :) I'm stating this just in case you don't read the comments, and let's face it, how many people really do when they come here? Not like this is a famous blog or anything lol!

My neverending battle against the weight monster has progressed in my favor by 4 whole pounds. At least. I'm sure of 4 of them. Yay me! Excuse me while I have a cookie to celebrate :P

My general aimlessness in life has also been solved I think. And let's face it, it was aimlessness. Yeah sure saying I want to write a novel by the time I'm 40, and I want to teach classics or history or whatever on a college level are wonderful little goals. Not saying they aren't. But they darn sure aren't immediate this is what I'm going to do within this time period (and 12.5 years is NOT a time period... it's a decade and change!) and then have done with it kind of things. But I decided and it's awfully nice :) Now all I need is for hubbykins to get his ass in gear and settle down with his job thing so I can do my thing.

It's really kind of a gigantic and thensome pain in the arse when you have to depend on someone else's schedule and course of events to determine your own...

It's also really kind of a gigantic pain in the arse when you're trying to catch a couple of extra z's in the morning only to hear baby shrieks of pain. Yeah. This is pretty much how it went.

Me: (mumbling from the pillow) I think you should make him eggs for breakfast.

Hubby: Okay!

a few minutes of peace and me quietly slipping back into dreamland.

Baby: SHRIEK!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! (fill in much anger and pain and baby screaming)

Hubby: OH SHIT! (running water)

Me: oh what now! (jumping up out of bed and into the kitchen with basically 3 steps and miraculously not injuring myself... solution to all of my personal injuries, always be in a hurry to see what has injured baby)

Hubby had indeed made the eggs and then turned his back on the kid and the still hot burner on the stove and PUT THE PAN IN THE SINK!!!!

First of all, never ever ever turn your back on the kid and the stove at the same time. I always shoo the kid out of the kitchen or do everything at a half turn so I can see the whole thing at once.
Secondly, for the love of pete man how many times have I told you not to put a hot pan right into the sink? Oy!

So with all of the not listening to me going on, the kid reaches up and decides to get first hand experience of just how hot the stove really is, cause us telling him since he could immitate sounds wasn't really enough. So three of his little fingers are burned and slightly blistered now :( He's been sitting with one hand in a little ziploc bowl of cold water all day. He needs a nap, I need a nap... Dunno if it's going to happen.

But he's fine and I can't really blame his father. Well I can actually. It's his genes at work here. Let's face it, the kid wouldn't be male had it not been for his father. He wouldn't have inherited the "I want to find out for myself just how painful hot can be" or insert other potentially life threatening anythings there, gene had it not come from his father. Because goodness knows I am so not the adventurous "let's see what happens when I touch this type." The absolute last time I touched anything I wasn't absolutely sure wasn't going to hurt me was the time my grandmother swore to me on a stack of bibles that the blue light wouldn't be hot cause blue was always cold... Yeah. Needless to say swearing on a stack of bibles and blue lightbulbs don't go far with me anymore....

2005-01-06T11:05:00.000-08:00

Oh. My. God. I am soooo bad. I still haven't finished and shipped holiday cards. Man, I suck. I WILL do it by monday. I will I will I will. Check back with me and kick my ass if I haven't. Please.

So. Here I am checking in at the airport in NY. LaGuardia even. And my boarding pass wouldn't print the day before. Minor irritation but no big. So I check the bags and get my boarding pass. And we're going through security and I find out I have to be searched as do all my bags. Wow. At least it was a random flagging and not like they thought I was a terrorist or anything. But I got the wand and it beeped on my bra. Well duh. And so the lady had to feel me up. Which was beyond disturbing. But at least it wasn't some nasty fat sweaty heavy breathing guy. Cause I think I'd have been tramuatized beyond recovery.

And then I went to my mother's this past weekend. So not only have I got all the laundry from NY and the little week after, but now I've got it from the trip to Houston too. So I've got assloads of laundry. Loads and loads. I've made a dent though. That's nice. Next I'll try to get the house back up to par cause it's getting a little icky.

Speaking of icky houses though. OH MY GOD. I watched "How clean is your house?" Two episodes. I can't believe I made it through two episodes. I was revolted. It can't be real. People CANNOT live like that. I mean they just can't. Can they? I mean I get a certain level of dust on stuff and I get antsy. I just can't imagine the horror of living in a place with * shudder * cockroaches in the freaking shower. IN THE SHOWER. How can you bathe knowing there are fucking cockroaches IN YOUR SHOWER???? I almost lost what little I had in my stomach at the time. It was horrible. Suddenly my house looked horrible to me and I could just SEE the bacteria crawling in the bathrooms. Of course my house is SO not that bad. But yeah I had bad dreams about house cleaning that night. Ugh.

I'm sure there was something else I had to talk about, but I've forgotten what it was in the horror of reliving the show. If you haven't seen it, watch it once. Then NEVER again! Cause it's awful. Just scary and wrong. Really.

2004-12-30T11:06:00.000-08:00

okay. As Nellie has so kindly reminded me I haven't updated in like a month. More even. Oy. She also kindly provided me an out by assuming I've been busy. For this I prostrate myself and kiss her feet.

Unfortunately I have to be totally honest and admit that I have not been all that busy. Rather I have been lazy. Oh I've been reading blogs. Right and left. But update my own? Too much trouble. So awful of me I know.

So the brief synopsis. The kid is still potty training. Other than a couple of ugly mishaps which have left poopy footprints on the floor (nasty in the extreme thankyouverymuch) it's actually going very well.

I did manage to get presents made and taken to NY. I still have to MAIL presents to CO and CA. Not to mention the rest of my holiday cards. This year was a bad year for me with being on time with cards :( I am a truly awful person. Well maybe not awful. But for some reason days have been blurred this year. I lose whole weeks. Not an excuse, just noting.

Christmas in NY was fun. Chaotic. But darn fun. Airports at 5am are unbelievably crowded. You'd think that xmas eve people wouldn't be in the airport at 5am. But noooooo. There they are taking up space and air and clogging the security line and making me have multiple tiny heart attacks every time I look at my watch and think to myself "The plane leaves in 5 minutes!!!!!!!" Yeah.

It snowed :) That was fantastic. It was the first time it has snowed for us when we've been in NY. Normally it waits til we've left before it snows. Got lots of gift cards :) That's nice cause they were easy to transport. People SAID they liked the cookies and bath salts :) Also nice. My mom in law is totally awesome because she gave me B&N gift cards and Starbucks gift cards. (So did my grandmother)

So it was definitely fun. The kid actually had a good time too. We didn't get TOO delayed coming back. Just an hour and half or two hours while they decided what to do about the insturment monitor that had fried itself in holiday depression. Oh and they lost one of our bags. The middle sized one. Why is it the middle children always get the crap? Poor things. But we got home roughly on time and we got our bag back last night at like 10:30 or 11pm. Amusing.

I finally got the lease resigned. The day before it expired... Yeah.

I've also discovered that everyone! is pregnant. I'm afraid to drink the water. I mean I know I'm on birth control and all... but sheesh. I love being a mom and all, but I really need to have a job for a while before I do the stay at home for another rugrat thing.

I lost 2 pounds. Which I found again in NY plus some of their friends I'd lost earlier in the year. I'll have to misplace them a little more cleverly this time.

I also read both Bridget Jones's Diary books. Hysterical. Even funnier than the movies actually. Because of course I can picture sweet looking Rene Zellwegger screaming "FUCK.FUCK.FUCK." As she looks for lost keys, skirts, shoes, whatever. Also highly amused by the fact that Colin Firth = Mark Darcy in the movies and in the books she has a serious thing for Colin Firth... Guess you had to read it :) Super funny though.

It's also kind of funny how things that normally disgust us become sources of major excitement when related to children. For example (and yes I know this is strange because it's natural and necessary but it's my personal quirk so live with it!) I hate biological functions. You know what I mean. But since the kid has been potty training, I'm all kinds of excited about stuff that makes me want to go wash and disinfect. It's even cuter because when he has his little baby BMs in his potty, he knows to assume the position to have his little hiney wiped. Trust me, it really is funny.

I've also started trying to keep a journal again. Trying being the operative word here. I'm usually so bad about it. But I'm working on it. Course I'm also working on winning the lottery. I think I have a better chance with the lottery in the long run :P

For now, that's all I have. I'm sure I'll come up with more. Oh like our new TiVo. My grandmother sent us one. SO TOTALLY COOL. I love TiVo. It's the greatest. Oh and Rachel Ray. I love the food network. And I love 30 minute meals. So cool. So naturally I've used some of those barnes and noble gift cards for Rachel Ray 30 min meals cookbooks :) But like I said I'm done so more on the whole cooking thing and soap thing cause I still need to do that oh and the joys of airport baggage inspections and being frisked in the airport.... yeah. Done. Will post more later :)

2004-11-27T13:21:00.000-08:00

It's amazing the things you can learn from watching movies. For example. Bridget Jones's Diary. Love it. It's just a great movie. From this, I've learned that I need to read the book, keep up better with my journal writing, definitely lose a few pounds, get my own personal Colin Firth (rawr), and move to London.
After Thanksgiving dinner was all put away and the baby was put in bed, I left hubby playing a video game and step-sister sleeping on the couch to go to the movies with A. We went to go see the sequel to Bridget Jones. It was totally a chick flick. And we both learned something. We're not normal. Neither of us are like that. I am more so than A, and even then I'm nothing like that! If I'm not a normal woman, A is a man!!! She's convinced women aren't really like that. But I had to explain to her that they were and that's why we had so few women friends.
Admittedly I'm sure that Bridget is an extreme example of the craziness that is womanhood, but still. My goodness! The insanity is frightening. Although I can totally see myself teaching a prison full of Thai women how to properly sing Madonna songs :P It makes me want to make hubby watch it and shout at him "SEE!! That's what I COULD be like! Now quit your bitching!" But that might be a little much.
At any rate, it's a fantastic movie and will be added to my collection :)

Turkey and boiled boobs!

2004-11-27T13:08:00.000-08:00

Well here we are. Thanksgiving has come and gone. Besides having enough food for 10 people and eating enough to where I'm still not hungry (although that hasn't stopped me from eating leftovers) I think it was a great holiday all around.
My step-sister slept basically the whole time. Not entirely her own doing, as antihistamines will make you a little sleepy. Add to that the turkey and her general love of sleep and it's amazing she stayed awake long enough to eat. It was great having her here though. And of course the baby just loves her.
A was here. That was just a blast. She gave me the bestest birthday presents ever. A dvd of a Margaret Cho act (just love her, but how could I not being as I relate so well to her!) and the dvd of TOFOG's American tour. Well the texas part anyway. So there I have Russell all to myself on dvd yay.
Turkey day went over extremely well to my way of thinking. I didn't burn anything, forget anything, or totally screw up anything. I didn't even hurt myself like I usually do. And I have my darling hubby to thank for that.
He didn't do it on purpose of course. But it just proves that my accident prone nature either is a) contaigous, or b) not solely limited to me as he would have me believe. But there I was heating some water for tea (the microwave can really heat up water after 6 minutes) and getting ready to pour it into my cup to steep. I say "Honey I have hot water back here." You'd think that would indicate that backing up would be a no no yes? No. He backs up and hits the VERY hot water with his elbow. And naturally it spills on me not the floor. But it gets better! It doesn't just hit me, it hits my boob! (Not that it could have missed.) So here I am with a scalded and quickly reddening boob as he's telling me I shouldn't have been behind him! Oy.
I can see how much progress I've made with my temper at times like that. I didn't throw the rest of the scalding hot water down his pants to burn his tender parts! So here I sit with a rather large palm sized red patch on my breast (which thankfully no longer hurts). He told me he hoped it would scar. Lol. That was funny. It's going to scar. I can already tell. If my skin weren't basically translucent anywhere the sun hadn't touched it would still scar. As it is, the scar should be glorious. Not that anyone is ever going to see it anyway :P The upshot though, as I mentioned before, is that by spilling boiling hot water on myself early in the day, I managed to avoid all the other minor mishaps I would otherwise have had. No burns, cuts, or random corner jabs in my legs or back. It's nice to know that if I use up my allotment of accidents for the day early on I can have a relatively peaceful day. Maybe if I break something next time, I can remain accidentless for a few months ;)

2004-11-24T12:33:00.000-08:00

This thought deserved it's own entry. I was reading a totally random blog. And the girl was talking about how if you have the right person there couldn't possibly be too much togetherness.
Maybe she's right. I don't know. But all I could think of was "Boy oh boy, can there EVER be too much togetherness!!"
I mean don't get me wrong, I love my husband. Truly I do. But there are times, I'd give his right arm to be rid of him! I can't imagine what life would be like if we didn't have things to do outside of each other. If we both worked from home, or didn't have to work at all (wouldn't that be nice... must buy a lottery ticket). If there wasn't SOME way to get him the hell out of my hair for several hours a day, I'd go off the deep end in a major way.
It isn't that he picks at me to the point where I'd dearly love to shoot him. It isn't that he's crude to the point that I'd like to poison him. It isn't even that it's like a freaking root canal without novocaine to get some gdamn affection. It's all of that. All of it. Everyday all day for the rest of my life. I'd have to be locked up. Or ideally, he'd be the one to go nuts and get locked up :P Then I'd be the one out having all the fun.
I don't think that means that I love him any less. Just like he doesn't like me to be close to him (close meaning I can't touch him at all) in bed cause my body temperature is uncomfortable to him, doesn't mean he loves me less. But let's face it. All hubby all the time = dead hubby. I'm sure the reverse would be true for him as well.
You can be stupid falling down drunk in love and eventually the togetherness would wear at you like a mosquito bite. It's there. It's itching and driving you to distraction. You try desperately to ignore it, because that will just make it worse.... but you. just. can't. resist! You scratch it like a madwoman until it's red and you've almost broken skin. And for a few blissful seconds, everything is perfect. Then it starts again.
I truly believe that for anyone to truly appreciate and love their spouse or significant other, they MUST spend some time, however brief, out of their company. Absence really DOES make the heart grow fonder. It just does.
I wonder if that makes me cynical or jaded? I don't think it does. I don't think I am. I think I've just become a little more realistic than I used to be. I used to believe that I'd fall in love and everything would be one long fairy tale or movie where they always get along and never spend a moment apart because it would just be too painful. Pft. Yeah right. And really, I think I prefer the reality. Even with the snoring and talking in his sleep and trying to decapitate me with his elbow in the middle of the night.

2004-11-24T12:23:00.000-08:00

so. Thanksgiving is coming up. Going to do the usual cook til my fingers bleed and then eat til all the weight I've tried to lose and actually managed to lose settles itself right back on my ass like it never left. Bleh. Actually I won't eat that much. I'll be good and eat throughout the day while I'm cooking instead of starving all day until dinner. Much more likely to not gorge that way. Of course it could backfire and I'll gain more :P But hopefully not.
I like thanksgiving. It could be named anything else and I'd still like it. Not my all time favorite holiday, but still a good one. There's something about cooking this really huge traditional meal for people you care about. Knowing beyond a doubt that no way is all the food going to get eaten, but sent home with everyone so all that care you put into the meal will still be with them the next day.
This time of year drives home how lucky we are. I mean yeah sure we're not loaded, we're still paying off student loans, we still don't have a house, Robert is jobhunting like mad in case of a lay-off. But what is all that really? Even with the massive loan debt, we still have enough money that Robert got a buttload of new clothes (he needed it!) and Dominick has tons of toys and movies and clothes. We have a nice place. Sure it's not a house, but it sure as hell isn't a hole. We have more than enough food. So much so that I have to wonder what the hell to cook. Yes we're on a budget, but that doesn't stop us from blowing some cash on a new video game for Robert and the kid. So what if things are a little tight? We still have so much more than some people. And while I think about it and am grateful for it all year long, this time of year just makes it more ... everything really.
It's nice to have to worry that you'll have too much food for Thanksgiving and not enough. That's the bottom line. I think more people could benefit from that particular thought.

2004-11-12T17:57:00.000-08:00

There's nothing better than cozy pants and long sleeved shirts (but not too cozy or heavy! cause I get hot) on nice crisp cold days. I love cold weather. And yes I know below zero isn't nice. But it is. Because you can put on sweats and sweaters and big down coats to go out. And you can have nice big roaring fires inside and hot cocoa and books and s'mores and soup! Yum. This is my favorite time of year. The chilly weather is energizing. I think it's because I'm hot. So during the hot months, I'm even hotter than usual and lethargic and dull. Okay, I'm probably dull a lot more often than that, but :P so there. It's funny cause Robert is kind of the opposite. Hard to compromise there :) I'm trying though. I desperately want him to get a job above the mason dixon line where we can have seasons. And Winter! I want to see the leaves change colour and fall off the trees. I want hot spiced apple cider. I want a big poofy comfy coat and gloves and a scarf and snow boots :) I want snow! I'll even shovel the damn drive and walk. I'll deice the damn car. Whatever. I've gotta get him hypnotized or something to get him to move us up north somewhere :) I won't shoot for alaska, cause that is just a bit much :P

2004-11-12T17:52:00.000-08:00

Changing the baby's routine = baaaaaaad idea. OMG. I haven't been this frustrated and wanting to send him back since the first week home from the hospital! lol. For some reason the other times Robert has been at work late and I had to do all the nighttime stuff alone it wasn't a problem. But the last couple of nights it's been like world war three in our house. The kid slaps, kicks, bites, screams bloody murder and generally acts like a mannerless little heathen. I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt and assume it's having a cold and having daddy's routine messed up. That and the fact that I love him more than my own life is the ONLY thing keeping him from flying face first into the nearest wall everytime he slaps me. He's two! And can you believe that when a two year old slaps you it hurts like HELL?!?!? Wtf? Last night though, he only pitched a fit for half the bedtime routine. So maybe tonight will be better. Let's hope :) Cause he's just too cute to be wall furnishings you know?

On a side note, I need to get started on my holiday cards. I want to try and have them done by the first week of december. That's doable don't you think?

2004-11-08T10:56:00.000-08:00

okay. So I finally got to buy Robert some new clothes. Yay.
This is the first week of his new shift so I don't lose him to the world of computers until Wed. That's good too. The baby is very happy. So happy in fact that he woke up (and consequently so did we) at a quater of 7am. Joy. On the plus side though he fell asleep for his nap on his own, in the car, barely finished chewing the food that was in his mouth :) Sleepy babies are good babies!
The game store is bogarting my game and I'm starting to get pissy about it. I know they probably don't actually have it IN THE STORE right now, but I'm sure they will soon and I WANTS IT!!! Grr. Oh well. Waiting is good for you. Builds character and all that rot, even though I've got so much character right now I annoy the piss out of people.
I've already informed a couple of people, but earlier today I saw Dolly Parton singing a remake of a song from like 93 or something like that by a group called Candlebox. It was frightening in the extreme to see a country star singing a pop/alternative song that I used to listen to!! Not to mention like. So strange. And scarring. Deep deep emotional scars that may never heal.
And my blog doesn't know about daylight savings time so I had to reset the time just now, which also means the other entries were mistimed. But that's okay cause who really cares?
I bought an elliptical machine thingie and it's sitting beside my bed. And everynight since I got it, it has kicked my butt. My thighs and calves are killing me and believe it or not my arms hurt too! Good grief. But I figure this is a good thing and intend to try and move past my 15 minute maximum amount of punishment soon. I figure another week and I'll be able to double my time :) Yay me. I'd really like to see mr. I don't dislike my figure and you shouldn't eat that because you wanted to lose weight remember get his hiney on the machine and do 15 mins without dropping over. But it won't happen ;) Cause he'll fuss and complain and tease and goad, but he won't get up there and show me how it's done :P Course he's not as out of shape as I am. But he smokes.... So we're probably close to even. His new clothes are so cute. Someday I'll have him all nice and preppied out and he won't recognize himself anymore. And he will finally look like a real person instead of someone that spends all his time tinkering with microchips and motherboards ;)
Oh and I had such the strange dream last night about ghosts and pirate ships and gold and ugh really odd. I can't imagine what put it in my head. It wasn't pirates of the carribean cause I haven't watched that in months! The last movie I watched yesterday before bed was Harry Potter! Sometimes I wish I could slap my subconscious and say what the hell is going on in there! I mean for goodness sake if I'm going to have a funky strange kind of dream, the least it could do is stick Russell Crowe in there! Inconsiderate psyche. Sheesh.

2004-11-05T13:39:00.000-08:00

okay. So you all know how I feel about reality shows. If you don't, let me just say that I hate them even more than I hate brussell sprouts. And I wouldn't force the person I hate most in the world, someone I think deserves to be skinned alive and strapped naked and covered with honey to a fire and hill and then dipped in lemon juice to eat brussell sprouts.

However. Wednesday night I happened across a reality show that I could actually appreicate on Fox. It's called Nanny 911. Basically, a family that has out of control kids for whatever reason submits their horror stories and they send a (woohoo british nannies!) nanny by to help sort things out. Can we say great parenting advice? Wow! I was blown away. Not only by the nanny, who was eminently competant as well as being compassionate and caring, but by the mom who just made me want to slap the crap out of her and make her see some freaking sense! OMG the woman made me look like Atilla the freaking Hun! Wow. So I have new resolve now, that Dominick will NOT be like that woman's kids ever. Cause before the nanny lady stepped in and gave the woman a spine, the kids were animals. So the last couple of days Dominick has seen mommy sternness like never before. Not that I was a total pushover before, but his I can get away with this much before mom lays down the law cushion has shrunk to a very small throw pillow. So because of sheer quality of parenting advice available on the show, it gets my vote for a watch it at least once.

2004-11-04T09:16:00.000-08:00

okay. so. We're getting our christmas pictures taken on saturday. And it's thursday. And I still haven't figured out how to dress the boys. Hopefully I can go out tonight and get something coordinating for us all to wear :) That would be nice.

Robert is starting his new shift hours on wednesday. He's worried that it will hurt me and the little one. I think we'll be able to cope fine. We'll actually end up being able to spend MORE time with him this way. We'll see how it turns out.

So, I started on my story. And I hated it. Until I got this totally great idea of how to make it more to my liking from an email. It was quite inspiring. Thank you J!! So I'll have to go back and rewrite it accordingly (what I've got so far anyway). And there was that really good idea in my comments from Treble. Thank you too! So I'll rewrite the beginning and change the pov cause I don't really like third person for this so it's going to end up being first person all the way through instead of the way I'd originally planned it. Honestly I think it would just work better this way. And then I'll write the way I hope it ends. Hopefully it will stay that way... But don't count on it. Characters often have a mind of their own. I hope I remember that and don't try to force them the way I want them to go. That always makes the story tank hard.

I'm having thanksgiving here this year. Course there are only going to be 4 people actually eating, cause Dominick doesn't always reliably eat what I cook. He does pretty well, but I don't force it when he isn't interested because he's still young and I'm sure his tastes will mature and he'll be willing to try more things. Goodness knows he doesn't get the picky gene from my side of the family! So I'll definitely do the turkey breast thing instead of the whole turkey, cause since one of my guests is a vegetarian, three people cannot a whole turkey eat.

Higgley Town Heroes has to be one of the best new little disney shows ever. Dominick loves it more than Jo Jo. Which is hard to do. It's terribly cute to watch him watching it.

2004-11-02T14:54:00.000-08:00

okay. so. Today is the day folks. Everyone run out and vote vote vote!! I did. It was amazingly easy. I figured it would be a lot harder with all the muss and fuss out there. Ah well. What do you expect with something so near and dear to so many hearts?

I've made a start on that whole novel writing thing... Haven't gotten very far yet. Rewriting as you go is probably not a good way to get finished is it? Oh well. Once I rewrite these first few pages I'll try and control myself and not do the constant revision as I go thing.

It's cold here :) My toes are cold and I actually had to put on a light sweatshirt!! YAY! REJOICE!!! I hope it stays this way for the rest of the year. I'll feel so cheated if we go back to 90 or even 80 degree weather next week....

2004-10-27T08:48:00.000-07:00

Hmmm national novel writing month.... 50,000 words in one month.... I can do that :) Consider the gauntlet thrown and accepted!
This of course will necessitate that I get off my duff and do the bloody writing. I'll be trying to check in daily and post whether or not I managed to get my crap together and do the pages needed that day. I guess I'd better get to work :) Good thing I've already written a few pages (yeah I know it's not nov yet, but I'll just give myself a head start cause I'm a slow starter when it comes to writing ;) )

2004-10-25T20:44:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I started writing again. And I must say I hate what I've written. And I hate that I hate it. I really wonder if part of the problem is that I'm trying to write longhand. My writing just can't keep up with my brain when I write longhand. The pros of this are that I have to slow down and think and make it all work. The con side is it comes out SUCKING!!!! Arugh. So what I think I'll do is type up what I've written already (with the appropriate revisions, like oh I dunno the protag having some spark of life in her boring useless existence! I swear the love interest is more exciting and he's not even really in the damn story yet!) and then try typing stuff and seeing if it comes out better.
I just hate the possibility of inadvertently copying the style of whomever I'm reading or like the most at the time. I wonder if other people have that problem. Little bits of style from whatever you're currently reading seeping into what you write.... It can't just be me. The subconcious just works that way. Mine can't be deliberately trying to drive me crazy... can it?
Anywho, since I doubt anyone but H wants to read about my writing EQ2 is going to be released on the 8th of Nov. Yay. Much fun. Not that anyone wants to read about that either.
Let's see anything interesting going on in the world? Other than the rampant politics invading every little megaparsec of my existance? Well there's the let's watch overweight people trying to lose weight to make the whole reality tv bullshit seem a little more warm and fuzzy and yes we do care about you and it isn't all just about massive facial reconstruction to make you look like a beauty pagent woman. Give me a break. The first person that ever has the sheer gall to try and get me on any reality show (even trading spaces or anything like that) or a talk show like Jerry Springer (more on this in a sec) will suffer the most horrible fate I can devise. Yes, that's right. Teletubbies! 24/7. With your eyelids cut off and strapped to a chair.
And then there are the people that choose to reveal things about themselves on Jerry Springer (or insert any other stupid day time talk show here). Let's think about this. The person I've been dating for 7 months and really seem to be developing a good relationship with brings me on Jerry Springer to 'tell me something.' Uh huh. And I'm stupid enough to go? This of course automatically puts them in the category of getting what they deserve! I mean come on. Who really thinks that going on a day time talk show is going to result in ANYTHING good? Besides the makeover shows. Those don't count. Cause on the rare occasions that they don't make you over into a total bimbo with 9lbs of makeup, they dress you in things that you can't possibly afford so you can't keep up the new look anyway and will immediately revert so wtf is the point anyway? (I just realized that Dennis Leary seems to be channeling through me right now.... He must miss the ranting being in the nice warm fuzzy firefighter show that I still haven't watched even tho he's in it cause it just doesn't look that fun.) So, either these people are just paid actors, or there are truly folks out there that WANT to air their dirty laundry on national television? I'm sorry but if Robert ever wanted to tell me a secret of his on a talk show, I'd just pack his bags and say I don't wanna know here's the plane ticket to Japan or something just get out! It's just asking for trouble.

2004-10-20T07:45:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I tried to post this as a comment, but for some reason it hates me and won't let me comment on my own blog. Bah.
I finished The Dark Tower #7 on Friday. I thought the ending was a little harsh, but it totally made sense and really couldn't have ended any other way. I didn't want the people that died to have died, but I suppose that also had to happen. At any rate, I loved it and I'm glad he finally got it all done :) Now all that needs to happen is Robert Jordan needs to get his crap together and finish the Wheel of Time series. I wish he'd done more to advance the plot in the last few books, but they were still decent reads. And I like the story line with Mat. But he needs to get it done already!!
I guess I should get my shit together and get writing... And I won't make any excuses for why I haven't gotten it started yet, cause I don't have any. Just everytime I get started it comes out sound stupid. Bleh. I hate it when I hate my writing. But obviously that wasn't the way it wanted to be written or it wouldn't sound like inane drivel. Of course, I COULD just go ahead and write it as a romance novel, then it wouldn't matter if it were crap because all romance novels are crap. And sex. Badly written crap and sex, yet for some reason it sells like crazy. And why? Who the hell knows. I think it's because there are bored women out there that have been brainwashed by Disney and Barbie to think that life and relationships should be more and better and bigger than they are and are disappointed that life isn't like the romance novels and so need to keep reading the romance novels to get what they're missing. But let's face it, that's just so not realistic now is it? What non romance novel man would ever act like they do on those pages? Answer: none! Oy! Stuff like that ruins women. They get to thinking that sex should be all flowers and hour long orgasms and are confused and disappointed when it isn't that way. They ought to teach realism classes in school, I swear. Anyway, before I go on and on about the evils of romance novels (as if I hadn't already!) I'll stop and publish this (with my pretty new flower!!).

2004-10-20T07:39:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I have this pretty new flower on my blog and LINKS!! Wow. All thanks to Liz cause goodness knows I couldn't have done it on my own. But now, seeing how easy Liz made it look, I've decided that I'm going to try and learn some of this stuff so I don't have to go whining to Liz everytime I need something done :)

2004-09-29T19:40:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I had lentils again :) And do you know that one small bag of dried lentils actually equals a whole buttload of rehydrated lentils? Yeah. They do. Lots and lots of em. Wow. So, I'm here thinking, "Gee, I have lentils. Yum. Whatever shall I do with the wonderful little creatures?" And I answer my self. "Self! You should make lentil soup. Because while the lentil soup you had in the can from the organic part of the store was good, you can certainly do better." And of course I had to thank myself for the nice compliment. "Self! Thanks. You're quite right. And so attractive too!" This went on a while. I think I might need to speak with a professional about having the acoustics in my head checked though. Every time I said "Self!" to myself it sounded like Emeril. So either I'm losing it, a distinct possibility, or I've been hitting the food network a little too hard.

Anyway, I made lentil soup. It was darned good. Lots and lots and lots of lentil soup. Robert of course hated it and had none. Okay well he didn't HATE it. He tried it and sorta didn't hate it totally he just disliked it a lot. But he did try it. So he scores major husband points. I know at least one of you out there reading this is going ewwwww omg lentils ewwww ewwww ewwwww. Hahahahahahahaha. So there :) It gets better you know :) I also made some concotion of some sort with garbanzo beans. Not humus. Just garbanzo beans and veggies and tomatoes and stuff. WHOLE garbanzo beans. Right about now the person that was ewwwing at the lentils has run to the restroom to retch at the thought of garbanzo beans. I hope he doesn't trip or anything. Hip injuries at his age can be ugly :)

2004-09-17T11:16:00.000-07:00

okay. so. My child is a trekkie. Actually I don't think he really cares about anything other than the theme song, but you have to start somewhere.
Found out that R is kind of getting shafted work wise now. First he was going to have to maybe work 3-midnight like once a month or one week a month or something funky like that. But it turned out he didn't have to so all my fretting was for naught. Isn't naught a nice word? Kind of old timey and hoity toity. Course hoity toity is fun too... Anyway, some guy with like no family or kids took the night shift so R didn't have to sweat it. But he wasn't going to have a choice about it one way or the other. It was either someone takes it, you all split it, or you find other jobs. Ugh.
And now, the place he works for (which shall remain nameless except for letting you all know that the main man is trying to take over the world and has more money than GOD!!! which should tell you where he works if you didn't already know) has decided to try and make all of their support outsourced to India. Which is good for India. But sucks for us and a lot of other people. Including the company. Because let's face it, when you get on a support line and need help, the last thing you want is someone with a thick accent trying to help you. Not to be racist or anything, it's just the way it is. When we need help we want to know for sure the person is understanding everything about our problem. And even if it isn't the case, a heavy accent has the effect of making one feel that they aren't really being completely understood. But still good for India.
Oh and now he's on 24hour on call status for the next week. WTF!!! As if. Oh anyway, since they are trying to outsource everything to India, they aren't hiring anyone else on peramently (or at least hardly anyone and definitely not R). And now also, full time employees won't be allowed to give references to the contract employees. So when applying for a new job, he'll be having to rely upon the management folks that haven't worked with him and therefore don't know jack about him or his considerable abilities. Hopefully said management types will be smart and check with the people he's worked with to find out about him before giving some stupid reference or lack thereof that will screw him job wise.
Hopefully he'll get back into a university atmosphere. He'll be happier there. And he'll be even MORE overly qualified once he gets done here :) That'll be nice :)
Oh and I've finally found the bestest soap mold in the world. At least I think so for right now :) I'll have to actually have it and make some soap in it to tell for sure. I'm fairly certain though that I'll be thrilled with it. Gonna have to order it soon. And my supplies. I think I will in Oct cause R will be getting an extra paycheck and I won't feel bad about sneaking just a little to spend on the soap stuff. Hopefully I'm good at it. Cause then I can have my own little soapmaking business. Although I doubt I'd be able to do more than pay for the supplies lol. But you never know. I could actually be on to something here. It's just that there are SO many people out there that sell soap. But you never know. I guess I'm done for right now.

2004-09-14T14:11:00.000-07:00

so. My uncle's birthday is coming up. Happy Birthday!!! He's old enough to be in AARP ahahahahahha. Okay sorry. Done now.
Robert and Liz also have birthdays coming up. Happy Birthday to you two lovely people as well.
Birthdays are nice. It's a nice thing to have a special day just for you. It's nice when people go out of their ways to remember it too. I got a really pretty yummy flavored candle for my birthday from like the last person I expected to hear from :) She's got her own things to cope with right now. But she took time out of her life and remembered me. I felt warm and fuzzy all day.
It's going to rain soon. I can see it thinking I should rain out there. I feel bad for all the poor people that are going to get smooshed by the latest hurricane. Makes me glad I don't live over that way.
My horoscope said I'm going to be very lucky on the 25th and to buy a ticket. So when I win the lottery, I'll be sure and share the wealth a bit before I tuck it all away in mutual funds and charitable donation accounts.
The baby now likes Mickey Mouse and Pooh. He even sings with the Winnie the Pooh songs. Pooh Bahr Pooh Bahr. That's kinda what it sounds like. Super cute. He's also learning that killing bugs is a good thing. I'm so proud. When he kills his very first roach or spider I'm going to make him a little hero medal. Finally someone to protect me from the creepy crawlies that won't laugh at me for it :)

2004-09-10T11:09:00.000-07:00

So. I'm feeling rantish atm. Why that's not so surprising you say. So true :( But I just can't help it. What's causing this urge to rant right now? A lot of things. But mostly terrorism. Specifically terrorists that kill children. Harmless, innocent 18 month old babies. Stabbed repeatedly because they cry. Well fuckall of course the baby is crying. There's a bunch of stupid fanatic mushbrained terrorists holding the poor thing and a bunch of other kids hostage. Why? Cause they're repressed. Because they think that violence is going to sway people to what? Feel sorry for them? Suddenly see the error of our ways and start seeing everything their way? WTF??? The only thing terrorism in any form inspires in me, is a murderous rage. I think people like that should be horsewhipped, skinned alive, strapped naked in the sun, covered with honey and fire ants, and left there til they are almost dead. Then they should be revived, nursed back to health and have the whole process started over again. They should repeat this process for EVERY SINGLE CHILD they have killed. Fuckers. Then they should be locked in a box. And the names of all the people they've hurt or killed should be branded into their bodies. And they should be forced to listen to the families of the people they've hurt and killed telling them about the person(s) they've taken it into their hands to exterminate. All their children should be taken away and raised by sane people. That way we can eliminate the bloody stupid useless pieces of crap without stooping to killing children. RAR.

2004-08-31T19:27:00.000-07:00

okay, so. I try hard not to do the religion or politics thing on my blog just cause I know not everyone always agrees and it's a divisive thing and frankly I don't want unhappiness and ugly vibes and stuff. But I have to mention that I just watched Arnold's speech at the RNC and it was just GREAT. He's a very good public speaker. And I know most people would say well duh of course he is, he's an actor. But, it doesn't necessarily follow because acting does not always follow with public speaking. Two totally different, although related, animals. Anywhat, it was a great speech and he said "girlie-men." I think girlie-men is my new favorite phrase :)

2004-08-26T16:12:00.000-07:00

Okay, so my blog has this lovely new look thanks to Liz. Isn't she a goddess? I wish I could do that. Of course if I wanted to sit and take the time to learn I could, but why when I have Liz?

Watching Piglet's BIG Movie again and again will get songs stuck in your head like you wouldn't believe :)

2004-08-25T09:44:00.000-07:00

So, I just read The Da'Vinci Code. It was really good. Or at least I think it was. I understand why people are so excited about it, but kinda not still. I mean on the one hand, it does espouse some really controversial ideas about Christianity and Christ and the Sacred Feminine. Perhaps one of the reasons I liked it so much is that I agree with a good portion of the bit about the history of the Church and how they gained power and that they shouldn't have made women into the root of all evil and demeaned them and such. But I think I would have liked it even if I didn't agree with that part of it. It was well written. And when it comes right down to it, it is a work of FICTION. Okay, one more time just in case anyone missed it, it is FICTION. No one can say one way or the other whether or not the theories in the book about the church are true, or whether or not Christ was married and had kids (although I'm sure he probably did). At any rate, I think it was a truly fabulous book.
It's always bothered me that Eve is considered the fall of man and the whole reason for suffering in the world. That is so the biggest load of crap I've ever been dished. There's another book out there that kind of reminds me of this. It's called the Magic Circle, and I can't for the life of me remember who wrote it. But it was good too. Something about the Sybillene Oracles and stuff like that. I'm sure this poor man has received SO much hate mail for having written this book, but honestly, I'm glad he did. Anything that makes people actually think about the beliefs they hold and try to disseminate to others is a good thing. Parroting is bad bad bad.

2004-08-21T12:35:00.000-07:00

okay. So I got my hair cut today. I got rid of the past couple of years worth of hair mistakes. Like bangs. Ugh. And layers. Double ugh. So now it's all one length again (and my natural color even) and it's just below the jaw line. Kinda looks like Liz's only frizzier. Somehow I have GOT to figure out how to defrizz and depoof my hair. Anyway it's cute and flippy and rather on the not so bad side. Robert got his hair cut too. But it's the same so doesn't really bear all that much in the way of mentioning.
I haven't gotten up in the morning to walk/builduptorunning, but I will. Tomorrow. For sure. There's also this 5k walk thingy for ovarian cancer coming up on the 18th. Maybe I'll try to participate in that... It's a darn good cause.
Monk's season finale was last night. SO funny. So so funny. Can't wait til season 2 comes out on DVD.

2004-08-17T09:03:00.000-07:00

okay. so here I am finally posting something again. It isn't as if I haven't had things to say... More like I haven't had the inclination to rant about them on the internet. First on my list is people who sell cars. Not all people. Just the guy that sold me my car. Except he didn't really sell me a car. He lied to me so that he could get my money and I'd pay an exorbitant amount of money for a car I'd be giving back since there's no way in this or any other world that I'd pay 35k for a car that's barely worth the 23k sticker price. Needless to say I will never again give any of my money to Chrysler or any of their subsidiaries. And yes I will be writing them a strongly worded letter on the quality of their dealerships and the people hired therein.
Also, I've noticed that my two year old insists upon ignoring any sort of direction or attempts at discipline that originate from his mother. Namely, me. He listens to his father. But whenever the words "no," "no biting/hitting/kicking/whatever," come out in my voice it's like the off switch in his brain gets flicked and all he hears is mwah mwah mwah mwah. And so naturally he laughs and continues to abuse me or do something he isn't supposed to be doing. I don't know if it's his way of testing the boundaries against the dominate presence in his life, mom, or if he just plain thinks I'm as ineffectual as I sometimes feel. How sad is it that I have to go away and refuse to play with him because he won't stop hitting me? And he hits HARD. I finally slapped him back the other day and explained that yes it hurts and no it isn't nice and would he please not ever do it again. Naturally, not only did I feel horribly guilty afterward, but he just kept hitting me. * sigh * So obviously the old give him a taste of his own medicine trick was a bust. And I'll not ever do that again. I guess I'll just have to keep removing myself from him when he hurts me. The thing is, he's so sweet all the rest of the time. His only flaw is his need to abuse his mother. What's up with that?
I've collected more soap making things. I think I'll just order the rest off the internet. Then I'll finally get to make my soap. Ditto when I finally get the rest of my candle kit. That should get here eventually... I wonder where I'll put the soaps to cure. Perhaps I could put it in the baby's bathroom cabinet. I'll have to see. I have time to figure it out until I get the rest of my supplies.
I think the baby's new favorite movie is Piglet's Big Movie. Which is good. A very nice change finally. Although he still likes all the other ones.
Perhaps we will go out to the pool later. If it isn't freezing again.
I made some korean food. It wasn't half bad. Not exactly like mom's, but I'll get there with some practice.
And then there's the whole exercise thing. I need to like sleep a little less and exercise a little more. I think I'll just kick my sorry ass into gear and start getting up early and walking. I need to. I think I will tomorrow morning. It isn't as if I can't get up because I haven't had enough sleep or anything. I don't need the extra hour and a half or two hours I get when I stay in bed until the baby wakes up. It's just being self indulgent. It isn't as if I don't get to take a nap when the baby does. I'm just being lazy. So no more of that. If I get to take a nap, I totally don't need to sleep until the baby wakes up. And with other people being good and getting out and belly dancing, I can't very well say I don't have the time or whatever. Cause other people (Liz) have lives and way more going on than I do and certain other people find the time to exercise. So all I am doing is making excuses. And man are they pathetic when you think about it. Here I am and all I have to do all day is housework, cooking, blah, and playing with a kid. It isn't as if I work or go out or anything even remotely time consuming. Maybe I should cut up my VSC and post the pictures all over the house as motivation. I could look like that too... Of course I'd have to be airbrushed and all, but I mean I could look like they look before the airbrushing. And there's that whole 10 high school reunion thing coming up. And goodness knows I can't go to that fatter than when I graduated. Might as well move my ass into a trailer and shop exclusively at Wal-Mart and complete the image. Or not. Yeah. Definitely need to take care of things before my ass starts overflowing the chair.
So, we live in a dry town. This is ultimately very cool. At least I think it is. I kind of like the fact that there aren't beer cans and bottles lying around in the street. Nor are there people begging for money so they can go buy some booze. Cause there's none to buy. And since neither of us drinks, this doesn't bother us at all. But it seems they are having a vote in Sept to see whether or not to allow the sale of beer and wine in town. While if the vote goes through, a liquor store would be an excellent investment, I kinda hope it tanks. I really do like living in a dry town. Perhaps I'll vote.
I know I'll be voting in the presidential elections. And we all know for whom I will be voting. Of course, come Jan 2005 I may have to move to Canada... Or England. Or mars. Then again, Hillary Clinton could run and win in 2008. In which case, in Jan of 2009 I will definitely be moving to like another solar system. Cause goodness knows this place will be hell on earth. And for those that believe in hell, that will be nasty indeed!
And just when you thought I couldn't ramble any more, there's another thing that has been preying on my poor little mind. What could possibly bug me? Pft. If you need to ask you don't know me very well. Everything bugs me. I am a downright crumudgeonly soul, I've discovered. It could be hubby's bad influence. He's certainly the hermitish type. Of course he's very fair. He hates everyone equally :) Okay not really. But it's fun to say. At any rate, what bugs me most lately is the school issue. I really don't want to put the baby in public school. Although the school district here in Irving is actually pretty good. But for the most part I worry about the things he'll pick up in public school. I would far rather put him in private school and then supplement his education at home, as I am certain I will have to do. Cause I don't know what the hell they teach kids in school these days, but it can't be much. It's just downright frightening what they don't know, and SHOULD. Like how to speak English. What on earth these children are spewing forth I have no idea, but it sure isn't a real language. Then there's the whole wanting to have a second child thing. Cause if I want to go to work when the baby goes to school, I need to have another child like now, cause otherwise she'd have to be stuck in daycare. And I don't want to do that. I need her to be ready to go to a pre pre schoolish program thingy about the same time he is ready for school. Or maybe he can be in school for a year before I start back to work. But it can't be too long because private school isn't exactly cheap. And there's the whole college thing. Then there's the fact that it seems like almost all the private schools I see are religious in some way or other. Not that that is a bad thing really, but I don't want my child brainwashed into a religion. If he chooses to believe in God, or Budda, or little green men that seeded the earth a million years ago then so be it. But I want it to be his informed choice and not something that he is trained in school to parrot back. It isn't their place to teach my child religion. It's mine. Of course schools have started teaching all kinds of things I don't think they are supposed to be teaching because parents are slacking and not doing what they should be. But that's a different rant, and I'm ranted out for the time being. Suffice it to say that parents should start being parents again. They need to be involved with their kids as more than a chauffer to and from soccer practice. Of course for some even schlepping their kids to practices and lessons would be a major step up. Bleh. Their should be licenses for that sort of thing. And all these poor folks that would be great parents are out there having to have fertility tests and treatments and adoption processes and all this crap, while down the road Sally Loser and her live in boyfriend are popping out kids right and left so they can collect even more welfare that they spend on tacky leopard print fur coats and pleather pants while the kids are going hungry except for the free breakfast and lunch they get from school and are walking around in goodwill hand me downs that are full of holes and shoes that are barely being held together with tape. Yeah. Makes me want to walk around slapping people sometimes.

2004-07-11T20:08:00.000-07:00

Do you ever wonder what it would be like to go back and just watch the world grow? Kind of like a fast forward little movie of how things evolved from the very first little microbe that grew fins and then later stepped out onto the shore and took a breath to the dinosaurs to the folks huddling in caves in the dead of winter to us.
I wonder sometimes at everything we've lost to have the "easy" life we have now. And then I wonder what would happen to us if all that was taken away. No I haven't read The Stand or anything like that lately. It's just a thought that percolates up through the layers of my brain and surfaces every now and then. It says to me, "Hey. If the world as you know it ended tomorrow and you couldn't go to the grocery store anymore, would you be able to feed your family?" And I have a moment of fear when I have to honestly say I'm not sure.
I mean yeah, theoretically I can kill and animal and butcher it. I know the whys and wherefores and even the theoretical hows. In theory I know how to do a whole buttload of things. But the real question is, could I actually put into practice these ideas and survive without technology? I know, I know, the likelihood of something happening that puts us back into preindustrial situations where we actually have to rely on ourselves to get stuff done is about the same as me winning the lottery. Actually, I probably have a better shot at the lottery. But does that stop the wondering? Of course not. Anyhow, the answer to the question is I sure as hell hope so. In the meantime, I guess I'll keep learning about those little things here and there and hope I never have to try to apply theory to practice.

2004-07-06T14:32:00.000-07:00

grrrrr. okay. so. Inconsiderate deliverymen who are too goddamn lazy to lift up their damn dollies and carry them down the stairs after they've dropped off their delivery and insist on banging said dollies down three flights of stairs thereby waking up 2 year olds that didn't sleep well the night before and have finally laid down for their naps and are only thirty minutes into these naps should have their dollies forcibly taken away from them, heated to a nice red hot glow and then prompty and with no lubrication shoved up their asses until they choke on them!!!! grrrrrr.

2004-06-28T21:14:00.000-07:00

okay. so. We just bought a 40lb bag of deer corn for like 4$. Wow. No we haven't taken up hunting bambi or anything like that. We bought it to feed the duckies at our park :) They like it so much they will eat right out of your hand. And the pigeons will too. They are cheeky little shits, getting right up on your hand and perching to get to the stuff before anyone else. Greedy. But sooooo cute. And Dominick is big into throwing corn for the birds. So there you go.

Also, we have rats. Huge honking seriously mega rats. Let me clarify. We don't actually have these nasty things. They are in the park. Nutria. How many normal people have ever heard of nutria? Boggle. At first Robert and I thought the people that put up the signs were being pretentious and trying to fancily say please don't feed the wildlife. But no. They're rats. After having thought about it for a week or so I vaguely remembered watching an episode of Insomniac with Dave Atell on VH1. It was the show where he'd be up from like 10 or 11pm to like 5 or 6am and explore all these weird late night jobs people had. One time he rode with a milkman :) I didn't know til then that there will still milkmen that actually dropped milk off at your house. Anywhat, on the episode I was talking about he was in Louisiana, and the cops actually had it as a part of their jobs to kill nutria. They rode around in trucks with rifles and killed them. Weird.

2004-06-25T09:50:00.000-07:00

:) okay. so. I just got a new fridge. It's lovely. It has ice and water in the door :) :) :) Sad the things that make me happy isn't it?

Dominick is definitely in the terrible twos! When he doesn't get what he wants he screams like he's being skinned alive or something. The kind of scream that makes people look at you and wonder if you're abusing your kid. I know, because I've thought the same thing about people in stores and stuff when their kids scream. Now I know better. They just can't help it. Their kids are trying to make them uncomfortable so they can get what they want because mom and dad will give it to me to shut me up if I just scream loudly and I'm being hurt enough. Oy. Very expressive word Oy. Kind of conveys pages and pages of meaning and everyone knows what it means when you say Oy.

Robert got his new laptop yesterday. He proceeded to spend all night setting it up and playing with it. I made him hang up on Dell's customer support at 11:30 because I was tired and wanted to go to sleep and since the computer is in our room now instead of in the living room which was a good place for it until Robert decided the monitor let too much light into Dominick's room and therefore interfered with his sleeping the light and tippity tapping keeps me up. There should have been commas and semicolons in there somewhere I know, but if I can say it all in one breath without pausing you can read it all in one breath without pausing :) It's possible, just read fast.

Robert also got his very first paycheck yesterday. Awwww.

I've decided I'm definitely going to the movies tomorrow to see Harry Potter. I also think I'm going to go to Wal-Mart and pick up a couple more pairs of these really nifty sandles I found there. Cause you know what will happen. I love them and so when they wear out and I want a new pair they won't have them anymore cause they will have been discontinued and then I'll have to spend years trying to find another pair of acceptable sandles. bah. Far better to get like 4 pairs now. Time to be done, I have two year old help now and my typing skills are currently impaired. And goodness knows I can't have typos. I might go nuts.

2004-06-19T20:46:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I don't know nearly enough html or anything other useful thing, I've just discovered. I don't particularly like any of the offered templates (no offense to those who designed them, they are perfectly lovely really, just not really me) and yet I am sadly helpless to rectify the situation right now. Bugger. This blue is nice for right now... I guess. It was that or pink, and I think we all know where they can shove the pink, now don't we? So I guess it's time to learn something useful so I can make my own lovely aubergine page. (For those of you scratching your heads right now, aubergine is a pretentious and snooty way of saying purple. Don't ask me why they can't just say purple, if I knew that I would be Martha Stewart. Not that I'd want to be Martha Stewart, cause she's going to jail. And even if she weren't going to jail, which I think she totally should be doing, because let's face it, although what she did wasn't all that bad really, she deserves to serve time for sheer stupidity for having done it in the first place; anyway I wouldn't want to be her even if she weren't going to jail because let's face it folks, she is annoying as all get out and I'd have to shoot myself if I were ever that annoying.)

2004-06-19T20:28:00.000-07:00

okay. so. We bought this screen door thingy at home depot so we could block off our porch so your random everyday joe whoever couldn't just walk onto the porch and the baby couldn't go tumbling down the back stairs. They were supposed to install it. So ten or so days go by with no install, no phone call, and me with a baby gate blocking off my porch. I'm annoyed. Especially since I've called already and asked what the hell is going on. Robert has called and asked what the hell was going on. So here we are yesterday afternoon and our door is still one inch too big and sitting in plastic. Third strike and all that jazz. So we called the customer service people and complained and the chick called the branch we bought the stuff at and yelled at them very prettily and we're going to be getting our money back. So, today poor Robert takes his purloined hand saw, you know those little flimsy ones that they use in the inbred movies to play bluegrass hillbilly inbred music on when they're making fun of people, and proceeds to cut the one inch off the door. Now, you're probably asking yourselves why on earth didn't you just buy the door the right size in the first place. Answer, we love drama. Just can't help ourselves. No, really, they didn't have them in the right size and they wouldn't trim it in store. So to avoid the hassle of having to do it all himself, Robert opts for the professional install. So naturally he has to do it himself anyway. It's kind of nice having a handy type male around.

The new season of Monk started yesterday. One of the best shows on TV. Kinda makes it worth while to waste your time that way. He reminds me of Sherlock Holmes. I think watching the new Monk totally makes up for the time I spent watching Sex in the City to see what it was like. It's not horrible or anything, way better than a reality show anytime! But why on earth do I want to watch yet another show about women who can't live without men, choose the wrong men, and generally make it look like all women care about is money, sex, shoes, sex, shopping, sex and did I mention sex? I mean please. I don't pretend that women don't think/talk about/enjoy sex. Cause that would make me naive and while I know I am, I'm not THAT naive. But jeez that just kind of makes us sound like, so sorry but true, men. Okay well maybe men aren't that bad... once they get out of puberty.

Did you know, lentils last a really long time when only one person in the house is eating them? Seriously. But that's okay, cause I'm flipping through my Indian food cookbook and Robert is going to have to endure my efforts to learn how to make convincing Indian food :) Don't feel too sorry for him. Even my experiments are edible, if not enjoyable.

2004-06-15T13:34:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I had these lentils. I've had them for, oh, millenia or something like. I finally decide to do something with them. I hit Grandma up for a recipe or two and checked my favorite internet places. In the end I put a little from all of them into my own personal made up thing. The recipe I'm mainly following says to stick them in the crockpot for 2 to 2 1/2 hours on high. I think, okay this makes sense cause lentils are little and should cook quickly. LIES! All lies I tell you. Three hours later and my lentils are still crunchy. *sigh* We had chinese food for dinner. But tonight damnitall we're having lentils. Robert, of course, has already turned his nose up. But he'll eat it. Or he'll be stuck with PB&J. So there! I'm making couscous to go with, so perhaps he'll at least try it before pronoucing it inedible for Roberts and other pickybutt eaters everywhere.

Dominick has learned how to pull my hair out by the roots. While this is indeed a facsinating and totally pleasurable experience, I'm trying my best to convince him to stop. If he continues at this rate, I anticipate being bald (at least in patches) by September.

And on a totally random note, Sam's makes surprisingly good chocolate chunk cookies. I think I'm jealous, but I'm not sure just yet... Let me eat another cookie and I'll get back to you.

2004-06-14T09:47:00.000-07:00

okay. so. I'm watching Bridget Jones' Diary the other night and there's an ad for a new reality show called Outback Jack. so, I'm sitting here thinking wtf??? Isn't it enough that Survivor is into it's like 800th season? As if that wasn't bad enough. Then they come out with the Bachelor and the Bachelorette and worst of all Joe Millionaire. I mean please. Just how desperate and money grubbing and sex crazed do they really think women are? And all these girls that participate in these shows make me wanna slap someone. Have they NO concept of how bad they make women look? And the Bachelorette doesn't help although one might try to argue that it does. Cause it's a double edged sword. Either it's all these women trying to get one guy, which makes them all look like desperate back stabbing bitches, or it's one girl getting it on with like 50 guys, which makes it look like women are just sluts. Great. So now there's a new one where all these girls are going to be fighting over this rough "Outback" guy. And of course he isn't really going to be some rough rich guy. He's going to be a burger flipper that makes 12 grand a year and lives at home with his parents in their basement with his playboy collection and his Buffy the Vampire Slayer DVD's. *sigh*

Of course it's not like we really need these reality shows to make women look bad. No, we've got OTHER reality shows to do that. Like Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie and their simple life thing. Gag me. Please. Jeez, at least Jessica Simpson admits that she's dumb as a rock. She doesn't even try. So she at least is charming and cute, albiet dumb as a rock. Lest we forget, there's also the Real World. Oh the drama. Or Sorority Life. Or even better this new thing on MTV where now we make you over in the image of your favorite celebrity. We'll just do all this ugly nasty PAINFUL plasitc surgery on you since you couldn't possibly be a worthwhile individual the way you were born. Oh no. Instead we'll change everything about you that makes you who you are so you can live out your fantasy of being Catherine Zeta Jones. WTF??? OH! And this morning plain as life we have on the news that parents are now promising kids plastic freaking surgery for good grades. "Hey Mom, if I get straight A's this semester can I get a boob job?" "Oh sure honey. How big do you want em?" Give me a bloody break. How sick can you get????

On a happier note, we've been in the new place for like a week (I'll post pictures as soon as I finish the last couple of boxes and figure out how). And Dominick has managed to lock himself in his bedroom, literally! And figured out the hard way that coke cans when dropped on the floor just the right way make these really messy really scary rocket type things that spray coke everywhere at a really high speed. Took him a while to recover from that little surprise.